8 Parental Suggestions to Stop Bullying in Middle School

This may sound counterintuitive, but middle school students are more vulnerable to bullying because of their abruptly increased social awareness. Due to their extreme sensitivity to social dynamics, children in this age range often exhibit highly reactive, competitive, and critical behaviors. This indicates that the limbic system of the brain is overactive rather than a personality defect. Teens that experience this take rash risks, actively pursue social benefits, and feel emotions more intensely than usual. In other words, if handled improperly, it is sure to lead to conflict.

It's critical for parents of middle school-aged children to realize that their child has ongoing social stress.Your child is constantly thinking about what other people think of him, whether he is at school or at home, and he is also probably picturing the worst. In addition, his heightened emotions adversely affect his capacity to reason through and make wise decisions. Because of this, punishment-based strategies—including bullying—rarely have any effect on the extent young people will go to win over their friends. Nonetheless, this does not imply that parents are powerless to stop these negative social behaviors.

A pound of cure does not always equal an ounce of prevention when it comes to bullying, according to study. Although up to 50% of middle school students try bullying, only 10% go on to bully regularly; most students are content to stop bullying as soon as they find more constructive ways to deal with difficult emotions and circumstances. Thus, it stands to reason that educating children in social and emotional competencies from an early age could significantly reduce the prevalence of bullying.

How Come Children Become Bullies?

The majority of kids who grow up to be bullies have learned at some point in their development that causing confrontation is the greatest way to get attention and rewards. These children frequently—though not always—come from homes with a lot of conflict and/or have not received the necessary moral education. They frequently experience low self-esteem and social exclusion.

Thus, there are two clear ways that parents can support the prevention of bullying behavior: One, at home, they ought to set an example of healthy, reasonable conflict resolution. Secondly, they ought to investigate the reason behind their child's label of "different." Many children struggle to be accepted by their peers due to social skills deficiencies brought on by developmental differences (e.g., a learning disability).

8 Strategies for Preventing Bullying in Middle School

1. Encourage a strong bond with your child and make sure it lasts until puberty.

Teenagers need their parents more than ever, even though they may not want to accept it. Your kid will feel more secure, have a higher sense of self-worth, and become less dependent on peer approval if you provide him with ongoing direction, acceptance, and support.

Accepting rather than resisting your middle schooler's behavioral and mental changes is one of the finest strategies to maintain your relationship with him. There are many positive aspects of this time in his life, after all: dopamine spikes motivate him to follow his hobbies and interests and gradually mature into a distinctive adult. Don't forget to enjoy yourself and engage your teen in the activities that are important to him. He will try to build peer relationships with a similar positive dynamic if you do this.

Lastly, remember to set aside time each week for your teen and you to spend alone, preferably doing something he enjoys. As easy as it may seem, this is one of the easiest methods to maintain a close relationship with your child.

2. Foster a feeling of belonging.

Families today are far too frequently estranged from one another, and bullying is strongly correlated with social isolation. Make your home a fun, inviting location for your teen's pals to hang out instead of rejecting them. Make an effort to meet their parents as well. Your youngster will feel more safe and accepted in society the stronger your social network is. Additionally, you can establish and support various places where bullying is not tolerated at all by getting involved in this way.

It's advisable to make an effort to involve your child in groups, teams, or clubs that correspond with his hobbies. This will allow him to interact with people who share interests with him, which will act as a safety net in case things at school become too intense.

3. Assist your youngster in developing firm limits.

You should teach your teen to set appropriate limits with others, both at home and outside, and to respect those boundaries. Inform him that you should be a reasonable, aggressive role model for him, especially in the way you raise your children, and that he should speak out when he feels hurt or that his personal space is being violated. This will teach your child what behaviors are "not okay" and how to respond to them in a way that empowers them without causing harm. Look into the parenting approach known as "authoritative parenting" for further details on how to raise your child in a way that is neither overly indulgent nor violent.

It's a good idea to keep an eye on your teen's actions in a discreet and polite manner as a parent. Keep a basic understanding of your teen's pals and hangout spots, but don't cross any lines by searching through his belongings or examining his phone. Your adolescent has the right to express his own opinions on social issues, music, and style; you should respect this. Rather than meddling in his personal decisions, mentor him where it counts most: instilling moral principles of compassion, kindness, generosity, and respect.

Lastly, be sure to be accessible to support your adolescent in upholding his boundaries. Tell him that he can phone you at any time if he feels threatened or uneasy, and you will come get him without passing judgment or making inquiries. Prioritize your safety.

4. Promote compassion.

Fostering empathy in your child will not only reduce the likelihood that he would grow up to be a bully, but it will also enable him to "depersonalize" bullying should he come across it. Your youngster will be able to identify with the bully's actions if he can comprehend that the majority of bullies have experienced unfair treatment. Consequently, he will realize that by acting in any way socially inappropriate, he is not inviting that.

5. Create a home atmosphere that values communication.

While most parents have no trouble educating their kids on important topics, very few of them have figured out how to actually listen to their kids in return. Respecting your child's opinions, needs, and distinct personality is more essential than adopting the mindset that "Father (or Mother) knows best." Allowing your youngster to approach you when he's at ease, content, and calm is also a good idea. Trying to push talks will make your adolescent feel uncomfortable. (Of course, teenagers typically shut down and clam up when they feel uncomfortable.)

All of the aforementioned is particularly true when it comes to delicate subjects like gender and sexuality; your child needs a confidante who is easygoing, trustworthy, and tolerant to seek help in these areas. Keep in mind that your child will still want your advice when it comes to very private matters. After all, he'll probably be reluctant to disclose such sensitive information to his peers.

6. Encourage your teen's physical well-being.

It's simple to let worries about one's physical health slide when one is consumed by the intense emotional drama of adolescence. Unfortunately, teens are ill-prepared to handle the significant changes they are going through because of things like poor diet and insufficient sleep.

Keep in mind that your teen's sleep cycle is naturally set at a later hour than yours due to biological factors. If he occasionally ignores his alarm, give him some leeway and let him sleep in whenever feasible. Similarly, ensure your adolescent has readily accessible healthful snacks when they are lounging around the house. Making nutrient-dense food the most readily available option can greatly influence the eating patterns of teenagers, since many of them will choose to consume whatever is most convenient.

7. Strike a balance between accountability and freedom.

Every new freedom ought to be accompanied by a fair degree of responsibility. For example, if you've chosen to allow your teen travel downtown alone, you should tell him to phone you when he gets safely home, call you when he's heading home, and arrive home at the time you've agreed upon. Inform him that the privilege will remain in effect if he complies with these guidelines and will be removed if not.

Make sure the growing autonomy of your child is handled impartially. It is never appropriate to take his apparent yearning for independence as a rejection of you. That's a typical stage of growing up. You and your teen can both benefit from a less stressful process if you approach it as a peaceful trade-off where more freedom is "traded" for increased responsibility.

8. Ensure your adolescent spends adequate time away from media.

Teens are frequently exposed to harmful messages due to a variety of sources, including the graphic content on television and in video games and the intrusive social media pressures. Even while it's impractical or impossible to completely restrict your teen's access to these items, you should make an effort to provide them with healthy substitutes for "screen time." It might be beneficial to have a conversation with him regarding the possible effects of the media that he watches and plays (for example, find out what he believes the primary themes are in the shows and games he enjoys, how they make him feel, and so on). In order to enable your adolescent to make wiser decisions, teach him to become a "critical consumer."

You can raise a child who is emotionally healthy, self-assured, and compassionate by using the aforementioned approaches. If enough parents take this action—and collaborate with schools to implement more potent anti-bullying strategies—it is possible that middle school may eventually become a far safer and happier place for all children.